EXCLUSIVE: Grandma of Benjamin player blamed for coach’s removal says he doesn’t deserve vitriol
Tags: football, Ron Ream, Sam Faria, The Benjamin School
| Thursday 22 October 2009 3:15 pm
Sam Faria
Until last week, no one outside of the Benjamin School had ever heard of Sam Faria.
The 17-year-old junior with the looks of a model was a not-so-good defensive back on the school’s average football team. His parents, unlike many at the chi-chi north county private school, aren’t on anyone’s who’s-who list.
But when the school’s administration forced the mid-season resignation of beloved head coach Ron Ream, Faria’s life changed. Faria and his family were blamed for the 30-year coach’s removal, a decision the school later reversed under pressure from powerful alumni.
“No one feels worse about the coach’s resignation than my grandson,” said Jane Larkin, the boy’s grandmother. ” Sam talked with Coach Ream on Tuesday and he told me it went well.
“We don’t have enough influence in the school to have anyone fired. We have no celebrity appeal or money to donate.”
An argument between Faria and assistant coach Tom Flynn on the sideline of a Benjamin game at King’s Academy on Oct. 9 ended with Faria pummeling the coach in the face with his fists. Flynn, 52, sustained a grossly deformed, broken nose. He’ll need plastic surgery.
Within hours, though, Ream was a goner. Ream admitted to placing his hands on Faria to discipline him during practice Sept. 30. No one was injured.
Faria, meanwhile, was arrested Monday and charged with felony assault on Flynn. He’s off the team but attends school.
His family, who was rumored to have requested Ream’s removal, has remained below the radar. But Faria’s grandmother, reached by Page2Live in her home in Delaware, said Wednesday she was too emotional to stay silent.
“We’re very upset,” Jane Larkin said. She is the mother of Faria’s mom, Wendy Faria, a United Airlines pilot who hasn’t been home in Juno Beach this week. “None of us is saying that Sam’s reaction (toward Flynn) wasn’t overblown. But he has suffered great humiliation as a result. He’s been crying. He’ll be scarred for life.
“He’s a fine, upstanding young person who’s very compassionate. If he notices an outsider in a group, he’ll do everything to bring that person in. He didn’t deserve this.”
For more, and the poll, look below or click
Larkin says her daughter, or anyone else, didn’t asked for Ream’s removal. Wendy just asked coaches not to humiliate her son.
Incidentally, Faria’s Facebook page this week linked directly to an online petition to reinstate the coach. The petition was partly credited for the school board’s reversal.
Sam Faria, meanwhile, was raised by his mother in a single-parent household. His dad, Marcello Faria, returned to his native Brazil after the boy turned 4. Grandma says he never paid for child support.
Still, Wendy Faria worked hard to ensure that her son would attend the private school. Sam is, says Larkin, on partial scholarship.
“He’s been a student there for 11 years,” Larkin said. “His mom believed that he needed a small school where people would take care of him while she flew. He’s always had a sitter when she’s gone, but she looked for a caring environment.”
Wendy has been in China and Japan this week, Larkin said, but was at the fateful game. Larkin described her as “besides herself” since the incident.
While the teen has no plans to leave the school, Larkin says she’s amazed at the vitriol aimed at her grandson at school and in comments on blogs, including my Palm Beach Post colleague Jason Lieser’s high school sports blog. That’s where the news of the coach’s removal first broke.
“It seems that it mostly comes from alumni,” Larkin said. “But alumni don’t know what’s going on at the school today. Some have been gone for a long time.”
Despite the physical nature of the game, Larkin doesn’t believe the coaches had to be aggressive with her grandson.
“He’s not playing for a college scholarship or anything,” she said. “He’s into soccer and running. He thought he could help the school by playing on the football team. He was just trying to help.”
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His reaction was overblown, there is the understatement of the century. His mother is beside herself, I would be too if my kid was this kind of a menace!
Thanks for your opinion Granny.
He’s lucky that he is at Benjamin and hit a coach there. Back in the day he would have gotten his butt beat down! He’s lucky and he should be held to the same standard as everyone else. It’s a direct reflection on how he is being raised by his parents! A KID SHOULD NEVER PUT HIS HAND ON A ADULT, PERIOD! That’s what you have parents for! Give him a slap on the wrist and next time that may be the last person he hits, feel me?
OK please. He and his family were blamed for the Coach’s resignation BECAUSE he was the reason for it! He assaulted a volunteer coach in front of the bleachers.
The grandmother (ya..she’s not goin to be biased at all..) says that he is a “fine, upstanding young man..and didn’t deserve this”? HAH. He is anything but upstanding and this is the textbook definition of deserving something.
The school cannot be responsible for caring for this kid while the mother is gone. If there is ever a time for this mother to take off from work, I would imagine it would be while her son was being bailed out of jail by somebody else.
No offense, but I think the students and local alumni may have a little more insight into the situation than Grandma does from Delaware. “He was just trying to help the school by playing on the football team..he was just trying to help”?? Ya..
Benjamin’s next move, after finally reinstating Coach Ream, needs to be asking this student, who is facing felony assault charges, to ‘help’ somewhere else.
ps. Jose, why is “This student should be held responsible for his behavior and get help” not on your poll?
Overblown? Since when is hitting your coach an overblown situation.Sounds like Grannys been hitting the hooch.
here is some food for thought…..mom…stasy home and be a family instead of flying all over the place. and screw the private school life….its for families that dont want their kids at home! PERIOD!
raise your kid and enough said….kid takes a shot at me…he’s going to learn the facts of life real fast!another spoiled kid from a broken family….typical
!
he should be expelled from the school. I remember years ago a girl was asked to leave Benjamin because she appeared on the show my super sweet sixteen and she was a total brat. The school asked her to leave and sent an apology letter to the alumni. Yet, they let a student who beat up and disfigured a coach to remain at the school. He definatly deserves the charges brought against him. There is no excuse for his behavior. Maybe if mom was around more he would not be such a violent person!
I don’t think I get this. The kids hits the assistant coach and the head coach is asked to resign??? WTF???
2 things. The Benjamin board have a responsibility to protect the school and its students. This can mean alot of things, but it is obvious they overreacted with letting Ream resign. The second thing is the kid. NOT having a dad around is terrible for a boy to have to deal with. Mom has to make a living. Dad is in Brazil smoking poppi. This kid needs to pay for what he did to the assistant coach, but my heart bleeds alittle more for him knowing the family life of the kid. I have known many kids without a good dad around who flourished with a father figure around them that they could lean on. I hope, for the kids sake, both coaches stand up like men and take this kid under their wing and show him what a man really is.
Are you kidding me???? The kid deserves a break–his model looks entitle him to more consideration than the old man coach, who’s ugly. Fire the coach! Make the kid valedictorian!!
“He’s been crying. He’ll be scarred for life”
“Flynn, 52, sustained a grossly deformed, broken nose. He’ll need plastic surgery.”
Sounds to me like it’s Flynn that will be “scarred for life”….literally.
Of all pictures to post…why is he shirtless? Come on Media! You can do better with that one.
As far as Coach Ream…he should be reminded that although times may have changed, what he has done with the The Benjamin School, and with the people he has instructed with his knowledge and kindness, should never be forgotten.
He is a Hall of Famer for a reason.
I hope Coach Flynn gets better soon and continues to give The Benjamin School his volunteering services.
Go Bucs!
tackle football is an assinine game in which assault and permanent injuries are common (i’m in the medical field). take an immature boy, he assaulted someone off the field rather than on it. this school does seem to have a disproportionate amount of out of control assholes who regularly make the news before their locked up.
Man, swing on coach Manzo at Lake Worth High and your a$$ is digesting teeth. This kid is a private-school bitch who has been babied his entire life. Plenty of kids grow up without their fathers influence and are fine, and you know why? Because momma taught us right from wrong. Coach pulled my jersey so Im gonna fix him one. Ha! Like I said swing on coach Lowe or Manzo at Lake Worth little guy… or practice a little more so you are no longer a “Not so good defensive back”
MORE TURDS FROM SOUTH OF THE BORDER…OR AT LEAST THE BREEDING.
His father bailed when he was 4 and his mother is never there. In other words, this child has had no parental supervision or guidance for his whole life. And it’s any surprise to anyone that the boy is violent? I would suggest that it would be preferable that the mother be beside her son than “beside herself” in China or whereever. Yet again, complete lack of parental responsibility has resulted in a member of society suffering grievous injuries because of an out of control young person. Well, I guess we should be grateful that he didn’t set the coaches or his fellow students on fire.
Mr. Sam Faria needs to be expelled from The Benjamin School before he loses his temper again and harms another student, teacher or other individual.
There are plenty of single parents both Moms and Dads that do excellent jobs raising responsible children!
Grandma Larkin if she is so concerned needs to fly down to Florida to help her daughter with Sam.
Throw this little turd kid in prison where he belongs with the rest of the violent uncontrollable juvenile delinquent idiots.Let’s see how tough he really is.He’s a ticking time bomb just waiting to go off.I would not want my child to attend the same school as this moron.He should be automatically expelled effective immediately.Let’s start a petition to have him resign instead of the coach.Some school Benjamin is.Suspend the coach and let a violent felon remain on campus.That’s a great idea,wish I would of thought of that one.EXPELL THIS FOOL of a VIOLENT ASSHOLE IMMEDIATELY.PUll your kids out if they don’t.Do you want your children around violent exploding delinquents?Capable of going off at any minute and busting your child up?I don’t think so.
Keep him at Benjamin. I don’t want my kids in school with this miscreant. If they don’t think assaulting a coach is enough to expel, the school deserves him. And the next time he assaults someone, it will be the school that pays for keeping a known violent person.
Run Ream one again shows what a fine man he is. He knows the meaning of forgiveness. Bless him for the example he continues to set for all of us.
Im tired of hearing about unfortunate children who didnt get enough of mommies hugs at home, its time that children of this era accept responsibilities for their actions,man up and be a man you dont resolve disappointments by beating someone up because you dont get your way. i hope the fullest extent of the law is bestowed upon you, maybe then you will understand newtons law, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction go cry about that, to someone who cares i dont. can you make enough money to pay for that mans nose, or will you rely on someone else to do it for you.
Thug
Please someone TELL ME
what the coach said PLEASE!!!!
Two words:
SIZEABLE DONATION!!
it must be a slow week for news. all the murder and other things going on in the world.and everyone has opinion. about a fight. everyone is only hearing what the news wants you to hear. I know this family and I know this school.and I know alot of the children that go to that school. HE WHO CAST THE FIRST STONE.
THIS KID IS A GOOD KID.He made a terrible mistake. which all of you that have blog.(Have never ever made a mistake in life before ,RIGHT).especially in the heat of the moment.I have watched many coaches in life yell. scream, hit , embarress, humiliate.a studient and thats okay as long as the team wins.every one that is involved.is upset with the direction this has gone. NO one should have an opinion. inless your involved. I pray the best for this good family. I pray benjamin school AND THE KIDS CAN MOVE ON.I hope the best for the coaches. and I hope mr. flynn has a speedy recovery. tHIS IS A GOOD FAMILY .UNDER TERRIBLE CIRCUMSTANCES. my last thought is , you better pray. that all your children dont make a mistake in life because this can happen to you.
BLAH! BLAH! BLAH! AS I WROTE BEFORE THIS MODEL SIZE MENACE HAS NO PARENTAL GUIDANCE. MOM I UNDERSTAND WE AS SINGLE PARENTS HAS TO WORK BUT WE OWE TO OUR CHILDREN TO HAVE BETTER GUIDANCE AND GRANDMOTHER IF YOU SO CONCERN WHY YOU COULD NOT HELP RAISE YOUR GRANSON HE MIGHT WOULD HAVE BEEN A RESPECTABLE YOUNG MAN, BUT FOR KNOW HE IS JUST A MENACE.
[...] unknown wrote an intriguing post today onHere’s a little tasterHe has covered South Florida celebrities, billionaires, politicos, socialites and sports figures for the past 10 years. In the preceding decade, he plied the journalism trade in such exotic locales as Fairbanks, Alaska; Nashville, Tenn.; Cologne, …. Dad is in Brazil smoking poppi. This kid needs to pay for what he did to the assistant coach, but my heart bleeds alittle more for him knowing the family life of the kid. I have known many kids without a good dad around who … Quitting Smoking Benefits to Consider is a post from: Free Quit Smoking Advice [...]
Excerpt from Benjamin Student Handbook, page 9…
In order to protect the school community, any
student arrested or under investigation for criminal activity may be issued a leave of absence pending resolution or adjudication of same. Any student convicted of a felony in a state or Federal court will be permanently separated from the school.
WHY IS THIS KID STILL AT THE SCHOOL???
I think the outrage over this case is two-fold. First, there is the outrage about Faria having punched his coach. But the real outrage is directed not at Faria, but against the school’s Board of Trustee’s for its’ actions (or lack thereof).
Here’s what should have happened after the incident.
1. Faria should have immediately have been suspended following the incident.
2. Benjamin’s administration should have done some background work to find out what led to the incident rather than firing their coach.
If these two very simple steps had been taken, I don’t think it would ever have become such a news story.
This kid is hot! Somebody get him an Abercrombie modeling contract quick!
He made a mistake and who knows the could have said something out of line and the kid just jacked him, it’s football the coach needs to tuffin up!!
What did the head coach do to the kid that resulted in his firing? That was never explained. Anybody know?
Sorry, there are plenty of boys without fathers who do not attack another person. Stop the excuses. Stop the pity party and get the boy some good counseling. He is suffering.
No excuse for violence. What did the head coach do or say to this kid?
And the comment by “Huh” is very sensible. The Board of Trustees screwed up! Is it money, that makes their world go round?
By saying he is “upstanding,” anything else Grandma, who along with Pilot Mom cannot bother to attempt to raise this p@#$y, says has zero credibility. Mom, you think this might be a cry for help? Get off the plane and raise your kid before he becomes another statistic. While he acted like a thug, he won’t last five seconds in jail. Finally, there are plenty of excellent students throughout the county in public and privaet schools who unfortunately live in a single parent home. Only one has sucker punched a 52 year old man in the last 50 years in PB County…
Another snotty brat POS throws a tantrum and the innocent suffer.Not enough of mom’s tit? Why is it that these dorks that do these kinds of things are always ” compassionate, can do no wrong, little babes in the woods”? Please throw the book at him legally and academically.
“He’s a fine upstanding young person who’s very compassionate.”
No, he’s not. A fine, upstanding young man would know how to comport himself in such situations. A fine, upstanding young man doesn’t have to resort to physical violence to resolve his minor problems. Was he physically attacked by Flynn? No. Did Flynn strike hime first? No. So waht the parents or grandparents don’t have money. They’ve clearly instilled the wrong set of values is this kid. I’m not saying that there aren’t times when one may be called to defend themselves physically, but if one leads a repectable life, those occassions are very rare. This is not one of those cases. This is a case of a coach getting into a player’s face for non-performance and the kid responded with his fists, causing real harm. Now the kid is also going to have a spate of legal problems to deal with as well. That’s what happens when parents abdicate their parental responsibilities.
If the mother is an United Airlines pilot, would someone please explain to me why Sam Faria is on a partial scholarship. Most pilots that I know about make in excess of 6 figures a year.
You missed the best part of this story Jose. Do a little more reporting. It gets even better.
Not anymore Real Big Daddy since deregulation most pilots are nothing more than glorified bus drivers.
In defense of the mom (who I’ve never met), why would she do anything to jeopardize or quit her job in THIS economy–especially when she’s facing thousands in legal and plastic surgery bills?
To her credit, she is working hard to provide her son with what is marketed as a good education. She’s trying to give her son a step up in the world. That’s more than what a lot of two parent households are doing for their kids. Don’t bash her for trying.
I’ve given up many lucrative jobs in favor of giving my child a quality at home life. I agree she should stay close to her kid, but you critics assume that’s even an option for her. It’s not an option for a lot of people.
Yes. Single parents do raise children to be good quality individuals, but that’s if they’re lucky. At the end of the day, it’s a TWO parent job. Generally, the children from single parent homes are not raised with the same opportunities as kids from two parent homes. It’s a sad truth.
At the end of the day, it’s up to the individual to accept responsibility for his own actions. Mom, Son, Coaches, and board members.
The kids’ actions were revolting as were those of the board. But hey, THAT’S BENJAMIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And to all you critics out there, back off. If you haven’t already, at some point, you’ll be down on your luck too.
#14…dip’d in chocolate…Ironic name for such an overt racist. Why must race represent everything for you? I guess some people cant function unless they are spewing racial hatred. Like most people we are tired of this lame excuse of using race to explain away everything. Get some help sir please. And also dimwit, he’s a white guy.
Jose,
Congratulations on your latest HIT PIECE on The Benjamin School, and congratulations for posting a tasteless picture of Sam Faria shirtless on the frontpage of your newspaper’s website. You have no class, you’re a tabloid junky, and you know absolutely zero about who this kid actually is or what happened. Chi-chi? Are you kidding me? Why don’t you go spend a few days at the school so you can get to know the people there, it would do you and the Palm Beach Post some good!
Buccaneer Fan Forever!
wtf is this? I rather read about someone getting shot. Glad the kid got arrested
ok, so I am new to the area, someone please explain this situation. A punk, snob, rich kid, attacks an assistant coach, and the head coach gets fired…
I just moved here from S. Georgia, and when I was in school and played sports, coaches put their hands on players all the time. They slapped helmets when you dropped passes, pushed you towards the ground on your 150th pushup, yelled in your face on EVERY play. A few things happend, I became a better, harder working athlete, and I learned hard work and respect.
If someone on my team would have atacked a coach, he would have got his a** kicked by the enitre team, then his dad would have kicked his butt after the game.
I don’t understand things here.
Ther kid is just a punk. He hit the coach and the coach just defended himself. Now the coach is being punished by being fired from his job. This is a joke! The coach should be reinstated and the kid should be expelled from school.
This kid is just a spoiled rich little brat and his parents are probably tied to local politicans. I can see it now, this punk will amount to nothing but a loser punk! Seeing by his looks he will turn out to be a drug addicted gay porn star!
If I’m reading the article correctly, there was an incident on September 30th where the coach put his hands on the kid first, creating the notion that it is OK to put hands on another person out of frustration or for whatever reason. I know the student punching the coach on October 9th was uncalled for and warrants suspension at least, or expulsion, but I feel the atmosphere was created by the coach on September 30th when he initiated the physical contact. Maybe the parent should have addressed the issue of physical contact back on September 30th and the incident on October 9th wouldn’t have happened.
capeg.
There has to be more to the story than we know. Why did Coach Flynn resign while the Fario boy remains. Assuming that Coach Flynn said or did something aggressive that caused this criminal reaction from Fario, there ramsins the undeniable fact this is a felonious assault. I find it hard to imagine that these coaches or the Benjamin School had never noticed his “anger management” problem. This kind of behavior does not suddenly appear in a vacuum. According to the story, he did not just strike out one time, but hit the coach several times in the face! He definitely meant to hurt him and should be prosecutied accordingly.
Jose … gimme a break … suggest you find someone bigger than you to pick on.
Yeah Lisa he signed up for football to avoid physical contact?
In my opinion, the mother who took the outright offensive with the Benjamin Board and the grandmother who makes excuses for him in this article portray the underlying problem. My guess is that Sam doesn’t really regret his attack because his elders have never held him accountable for any of his actions, even as his volunteer coach is headed for reconstructive surgery. Lack of a father figure, please. Let his mom and grandmom explain it to the judge handling his case, Sam’s learning the untaught lessons the hard way.
This is so stupid,
everyone is blowing this way out of proportion.
Sam is a teenager and teenagers make mistakes and do things without thinking. All of these articles make it sound like Sam is the only teenager on the Earth who has punched anyone, adult or not, in the face. To put all this blame and hate on a single child is extremely harsh, and how would you feel if this was your child and your family. Wendy, sams mother, is just being a mother supporting her children. She is a single parent supporting two kids and you all have the audacity to say “shes on no ones who’s who list”, well id like to see you be as strong of a mother as she is. This situation was blown way out of proportion and is very childish of all of you to be putting all the blame on sam, because as far as i remember the coach put his hands on sam first. Sam and his family should be left alone instead of having reporters call everyone and anyone they possibly can, i mean his grandmother, how low can you get?
The biggest loser here is the school itself as the public is given the opportunity to see just how crude and immature are the school’s students and the parents. This blog and the comments are a sad reflection of what used to be a reputable institution - any parent, teacher, or administrator not embarrassed by this blog is part of the problem.
Again, the “post” reports inaccurate information. You really should get the “facts” before writing anything. If you did report the TRUTH you would realize this coach has overstepped his boundaries on numerous occasions with more than one student. Is winning that important? To let your kids be smacked around and humiliated by some has been coach. Sam was defending himself from an old used up past his prime coach in a little NOTHING school. If it had been my son, that coach would have been lucky he was hit by a 17 year old and not “MOM”. Best of luck Sam and family. Your much better off without that petty, backstabbing fluff school.
Like many from Benjamin they are priviledged kids with spoiled home lifes who have encountered problems with the law. Now with felony charges being brought why is Sam still in school? How can you teach responsibility to a child whose dad took off for Brazil when Sam was 4 and a United pilot mom with trips to China is often away? Let Sam take responsibility for his actions but it seems he rarely had to as a teenager growing up.
PUT SAM IN THE SERVICE SO HE CAN LEARN DISCIPLINE AND MAYBE BE A PILOT LIKE MOM.
Hey will someone out there tell me why Nicklaus’ grandson Nick O’Leary has left Benejamin for Dwyer? All of their kids with the financial backing of Jack get to go there. It’s not BEEN printed. But the Post article says that Nick’s mom is baking cookies for her son and the team. Wow! Sounds like Hiliary and “It takes a Village”. We public school national honor kids (i.e. brother & sister) who played against Benjamin and come from good families don’t need our parents to pay 22K to send us to a snootie private school and on SCHOLARSHIP! We worked and earned our way. Now we are ready to graduate from a school whose academic and football program is #1.
The grandmother of this young man is enabling his behavior. He should be kicked out of Benjamin and face charges for assault. There is absolutely no excuse for his bad behavior. What is with kids these days that they have no respect for authority?. Parents should DEMAND that this kid be removed!!!!!
Okay, for some of the morons who have been bloviating about this subject, please read this slowly so you might have a chance to understand. Sam needs to pay for what he did, no question about it. But for you idiots who think a boy without a father can’t lead to some bad times, take your judgemental head out of your ass! Should he be in school today? NO! Are all Benjamin students “spoiled brats”? NO! I know some kids from TBS and they are some of the nicest and respectful kids I know. Are all kids who go to Palm Beach Lakes thugs? Of course not! You simple minded oafs who classify all people in one lump are amazingly stupid. Kids do make stupid mistakes … some bigger than others. To classify Sam like he is Charles Manson is beyond sane reasoning. All parties in this episode I am sure can learn something from this. I hope Coach Flynn can find a way to forgive and Sam finds a way to prove true remorse. No one is dead, all are alive. There is a way for all involved can come out of this better people, and especially Sam growing into a good man …. something his father chose not to be.
To answer Ben’s question - Nick is attending Dwyer so he can gain more exposure for football. The division in which Benjamin plays does not attract the college scouts that Dwyer’s division attracts. Benjamin plays against other small schools and therefore does not have the same level of competition. From what I understand, Nick has real potential for playing college ball – several great programs are after him. As has been said in several of these blogs, although they have an excellent athletic program for a school their size, Benjamin is not the school to go to if you want to be recruited by top colleges. Not to say it hasn’t happened, but you have a much better chance at a bigger high school. Considering his passion for football, the O’Leary family made a smart choice for their son.
As for Faria… he may be a good kid, but he made a big mistake. The easy thing is to let it slide. However, the school should take a stand, enforce its rules, and hold him accountable. If they don’t, what does that say to the rest of the students? If he can get away with hitting a coach, what else can students get away with??
WHY IS THIS KID STILL AT BENJAMIN???
I’m single mom, working 2 job to have my son at a private school (TKA), I was at that game. !!!
THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR THIS BEHAVIOR..!!!
Stop making excuses for spoiled-money monkey kids…If my son did something like that I will be the first one to throw him in jail.. I know he is not perfect nobody is, but I’m sure he would not even try that becuase i would beat him the same way he hit the coach, so he knows how is feel.
With respect to the BucGrad’s ‘twisted’ comments regarding Nick O’Leary playing football at Dwyer HS because it a better school to recruit football talent than Benejamin is not being truthful.
I thought achieving an education while at the very elite Benejamin HS where the Nicklaus clan attends was the first priority and football second. There have been many who went to less rated football schools and went on to play college ball.
Does private Cardinal Newman have a strong football program? I don’t think so. But John Carney made the NFL Chargers as a kicker and Otis Anderson came out of troubled Forest Hill HS to later play in the NFL.
Just think if Nick O’Leary achieved great success in the classroom he would not have to worry about getting a job on the outside like many now do. To say that the upscale Benejamin school does not have such a program to further Nick along in his quest for ‘football’ greatness is being short sided. What a ’slam’ on Coach Ream with thirty years as a very successful winning coach at Benejamin.
The academic program and honor code at Benejamin is well respected. Coming to Dwyer which is an ‘A’ rated school may serve him well. My ‘A’ student daughter at Dwyer should know she has taken classes with him and he it seems is more interested in other activities than academic excellence.
When I was growing up, the coach would have beaten the hell out of the student daring to hit him… and the parents would have thanked the coach for teaching their son a lesson.
Any student who hits a coach should be evaluated… as should his parents… this is not normal behavior and certainly indicative of things to come.
The best thing that could happen to the student would be for the parents to leave him in jail for a while and realize the full extent of his actions. Tough love is needed in order to avoid future altercations. This teens better be dealt with or else our society will end up dealing with him later.
[...] are that Faria’s mother demanded Ream’s resignation or else she would sue (a charge Faria’s grandmother denied on her behalf), and that Ream was reinstated because powerful alumni intervened (something that has not been [...]
Kick this kid in the balls!!!!!!
He knocked the coach out and was like what? what? I bet that coach will not walk up on anyone else.
Parent of former students at Benjamin…and 2 football players
Good comes from all bad. I know he must have had a few really bad days after the suspension, but Coach Ream has got to FEEL the LOVE! (Over 200 responses of admiration and respect, and love.) He has certainly “Made a Difference” in many, many lives. People can live a lifetime and never realize that.
Hopefully Faria has learned a very valuable lesson. In the least, he needs anger management. May God bless them both!
Judy Barner
The bottom line is that when the police came to arrest Faria in Juno Beach, his father was in Brazil, his mother was in China and his grandmother was in Delaware.
Sure, there may be reasons for that (father ran out, mother’s career, etc.) but the bottom line is the same.
Maybe the mother didn’t want to leave job as an airline pilot to be around her family because she wanted to advance her career. Maybe she couldn’t leave because there were no other jobs where she could support her family. In the end, it doesn’t matter.
Faria is 17, months away from being an adult. He is responsible for his own actions and their consequences.
In today’s society, half of all marriages end in divorce. You can go through several areas of South Florida and see a number of kids without fathers living in abject poverty. That doesn’t excuse Faria’s behavior.
Now onto Beachbum’s point. Faria is not Charles Manson. Unless he’s had prior run-ins with law, he probably shouldn’t be thrown in jail. But he should face charges for assault and given a sentence that matches the first-time charge for a juvenile.
I’ve spent some time in the military and have seen a number of kids like Faria (and some much worse) that entered and went onto successful careers both in the service and after leaving the service. I attended law school with an individual that had a grand theft conviction as a juvenile. But the one thing that every one of them had in common was that at some point in their lives, they were held accountable for their actions.
What does NOT help Faria is for family, friends and educators to make excuses for his behavior (e.g., “but a coach pulled his jersey”, “he doesn’t have a father” etc.). I’m sure his mom feels some level of guilt for working half way around the world while her son is having problems or for not having been able to have a male role model for her son to follow. But she shouldn’t let that guilt interfere with the need to hold her son accountable for his actions. He’s now a young man.
Maybe it’s not a bad thing that the press picked up on this story. If all those around him are making excuses for Faria’s behavior, perhaps the negative media attention have helped Faria learn that he is responsible for his actions.
And if Faria is reading these blogs, consider this a learning experience. In many ways you’re fortunate. You’re learning this lesson before you turn 18. The coach you beat up will ultimately be OK, which might not have been the case if you had landed a lucky punch to the temples that could have killed him. If that had happened, you’d be going to jail for a long time.
You’ll be able to get on with your life and eventually this will all pass. People will forget it and it’s something that will only be brought up at future reunions, when the conversation will go something this:
“Man, I remember that. I can’t believe that you actually did that.” And you’re response will be something like, “Yeah, I was real a dumba** when I was kid sometimes. Hey, so speaking of kids, how are yours these days?”
For anyone that thinks Coach Ream has overstepped his boundaries on any occasion, they are sadly mistaken. He has been at The Benjamin School for 36 years for a reason, he is in the hall of fame for a reason, hundreds of alumni supported him and said they would never give a penny to the school again because he is one of the best and most consistent people the school has ever had in its existence. Unfortunately, times have changed in that parents think their kids do no wrong. Kids are babied, spoiled and think they have the authority of adults when they do not. Five years ago this kid would have been suspended if not expelled from the Benjamin School. Any parent or anyone else who thinks the kid did not do anything wrong and should be given a break should be ashamed of themselves. This was not a simple mistake made by a child in any way, shape or form. He punched a coach so many times that he broke his nose! Stop defending him! There are hundreds and thousands of kids who come from broken homes way worse than his. He goes to a beautiful, enriching school where I am sure he has numerous amounts of friends and he should be thankful for that. The fact that his father is not around and his mother is away at work very often gives NO excuse for him to punch an authority figure so many times that his nose broke. He needs to learn discipline and respect. It is a shame to see that the school is almost run by parents now. I know for a fact that 10 or even 5 years ago this kid would have been expelled on the spot, and he should have been. It’s a shame to see how times have changed and a coach can’t even make contact with his players during the practice of a CONTACT SPORT. He should have played tennis if he didn’t want to deal with contact.
Making excuses for anyone’s behavior because they are the son/daughter of a single parent is no explanation for any kind of behavior like hitting someone else. No one has explained yet why Ream was asked to resign and then this student hits an assistant coach and breaks his nose. What is really going on here? Benjamin has a number of students who have caused a great deal of harm in the community for some reason. Remember the Benjamin student who killed a pizza driver at the intersection of Prosperity Farms Road and PGA Boulevard after having allegedly ingested alcohol and prescription medicine? Maybe we’re looking at a culture of entiltelment and priveledge that places these students above the law and respect for others? Whatever the case we are hearing too many students from Benjamin giving the rest of the school and students/staff a bad name they don’t really deserve. And I thought that the public schools couldn’t get rid of the problem students they have except to send them to jail or an alternative school.
The kid hit a teacher. Why is he still in school? Why is the tuition I pay being used to suppliment the continued education of this kid? Benjamin is not a remedial reform school. It is a privledge to attend. He has forfeited that privledge. What message is being sent to teachers and coaches. Are they punching bags for students?
I echo Exnjcop’s remark. It is outrageous that this boy is still at Benjamin School. Note to the School: If he harms my kid (or any other)at school you will know why you should have asked him to leave the School. Can he reform? I hope so. But it is appropriate to remove him from the Benjamin School community. Did you notice Sam’s comment on the petition for Ron Ream’s reinstatement? Sam linked to it on his Facebook page. He said–”Sorry Coach Ream. I didn’t mean for all this to happen. But I’m glad I broke that nose.” And as for his Benjamin scholarship–yes, his mother earns a six figure salary. Hard to believe they qualify–but notice that Benjamin gets to include him in their minority quota because of his Brazilian background.
Actually several thoughts.
1. How many of you who are so busy convicting this child and his family in the court of public opinion actually witnessed this event? How many of you KNOW ALL OF THE FACTS?
2. What ever happened to innocent until convicted guilty?
3. What value in this case, to either side do the racist comments have?
4. Does it hurt your pride to know that this child’s mother actually holds a full time job? Yet alone one that holds prestige and a good salary?
5. We are born with a fight or flight instinct. Was this boy placed in a position where that instinct had to be called upon?
7.I do believe that no matter what you might think or say… the truths of this incident will come out in the courts. In court legitimate witnesses will take the stand. Facts will be brought to the surface and the matter will be resolved. Until then, let us not judge anyone in this matter.
8. I do have to agree with the fact that football is a violent sport. The thinking of do whatever you have to do to win the play, to win the game. Take this guy out, take that guy out….. violence begets violence. Golf, tennis, track and field, baseball, etc seem to not have the high incidence of violence that this game has.. maybe ALL SCHOOLS should reconsider their sports progams and eliminate the games of violence…boxing, football etc.
I was going to keep my opinion to myself, but “Just a Thought” is so misguided I think I better express what most of us in the Benjamin community are saying:
1. We want the Benjamin School to represent the BEST in Florida. That is, the best morals, behavior, sportsmanship. Yes, I was at the game, and yes, I saw Sam Faria brutally beat Coach Flynn. What is this nonsense about a “fight or flight” response? The 17 year old is NOT a “child”, and should not be behaving like a wild animal fueled by some adrenaline-driven “fight or flight”. It is a sad failing not to have ANY self-control. But does grandma ask Sam to take responsibility? Listen to what she said…
2. “He’s a fine, upstanding person who’s very compassionate…” (Right. Compare that to his statement days after the event…”I’m glad I broke that nose”)
3. “He (Sam) didn’t deserve this.” Really? This happened to Sam? No, you got that backwards, granny. Sam is the problem, not the victim. If he thought he was being “mistreated” by these great coaches, then what could he do…let’s see, 11 years of Benjamin education and he can’t figure that out…
4. According to granny, Sam’s mother never threatened a lawsuit. Granny is wrong there. As will come out in court, Wnedy not only threatened a lawsuit, she threatened to give a videotape that she has of Sam beating the coach to show on the ten oclock news. How this was supposed to help Sam’s case is not too clear.
5. According to granny, “We don’t have any…money to donate.” In fact, granny and Sam’s grand pa who is a retired pilot could each provide substantial support to the school. I’m not saying that they do. I’m simply saying that they could have demonstrated reponsibility and generosity to Sam by helping with his tuition (rather than letting those of us who scrimp to afford a full tuition pick up the scholarship aid for Sam). They could have cut back on their vacations in Europe maybe. They could have spent time with Sam in Florida modeling responsible adult behavior while his mother is away working. But deos granny step forward to own any of this?…you see my point.
6. Finally, and most laughable of all, granny says that “Sam’s mother believed he needed a small school where people would take care of him while she flew.” What an amazing thing to admit: Sam’s family wants the school to take on part of the role that they, as a family needed to play in Sam’s life. Why on earth should Coach Ream come in to bail Sam out? Last I knew, planes fly both to and from China–any reason that Sam’s mom couldn’t explain that she had a family crisis and get on the next plane back? Instead, she wnet on to Japan and let the Benjamin School pick up the pieces for her. Why be gone five or six days? Any reason the retired granny can’t come down here and look after her grandson? Responsibility, folks. Don’t blame us for bringing up scholarships, Hispanic heritage, absentee fathers, working mothers or absentee grandparents. They were all excuses that the grandma brought forward to explain Sam’s gruesome behavior. As excuses, they may reflect on her and her family’s values, but they don’t hold water for excusing Sam Faria’s behavior.
7. Let Benjamin be the great school it can be. Let Coach Ream, the hard-working, respectful, self-controlled football players and the teachers and administrators of teh school get on with their jobs, and let Sam make a better life for himself outside of Benjamin School.
For Ben,
1. Do you know what an effete snob is?
2. Who does the “We” represent in statement number 1
it appears to me that this was written by ONE
person who believes that speaking for an imaginary
“We” is a liberty afforded us under the guise of
freedom of speech. I suppose I could request the
a copy of the petition that all of the “we” may
have signed asking you to share this “collective”
opinion.
3. Please do tell the facts of all of the
vacations sams grandparents have taken.
Better yet provide photographs to substantiate
this statement.
4. What was said between the coach and sam prior
to this altercation. Did the coach put his
hands on the kid?
I do not pretend to know the answer to these questions. But I do know that every morning i witness the behavior of a group of benjamin students, as we seem to go to the same bagel shop daily. These kids show no better manners, or behavior than any other child their ages. They let doors close in the face of others as if the person behind them does not even exist. They leave huge messes on the table tops, some of them do not bother to throw away their own trash. They are no better than any other student from any other school. They are not supermodels of appropriate social behavior. Do not get me wrong, I am sure that there are exceptions, but then there are exceptions i every other school. So in my own opinion, let us not convict anyone in the court of public opinion. Let the court’s sort it out. See Benjamin for what it is, Just another School. The TRUTH will come out in court, it is not my job or anyone elses here to Claim to know the entire story and then pass judgement.
Signed Misguided
#1 Ghetto Street
Nopedigree Fl.
The Benjamin School has lost the respect of the community. The Headmaster and the Board have handled the situation poorly from the beginning. The student wasn’t even suspended for his actions. In Mr. Benjamin or Mr. Kehl’s days, Sam Faria would haven been expelled and that would have been the end of the story. TBS and his family aren’t doing the young man a favor by not disciplining him.
If anyone knows this kid, please step up. He is a great person, really kind and all his grandma said about him is true. His dad left when he was 10, not 4, and yes, he payed for child support while he was in the State, and now pays in Brazil (he didn’t disappeared; he went to court in Brazil to have the situation legalized. This doesn’t take the responsibility of his acts. But good journalism usually hear all sides, and the only side heard was the grandma, who gave wrong information on this interview. Even Sam would confirm that his dad left when he was 10.